This is my first legend. *sniff,sob* It brings back such fond memories... Anyways, on with the story.

A long, long time ago, humans stumbled about the earth, shivering with cold. No, it was not because they did not have fire. That is a boring legend. No, humans had no hair. None at all. They were as naked and bare as a naked person who just shaved off all of their hair. And those poor dears were freezing. And because they were freezing, they couldn't evolve or anything like they were supposed to.

Now, the Godly Powers that watched over the world with great compassion hated to see their mortal pets in pain or not evolving. They decided they must solve the problem. Now, the Godly Powers were very direct immortal and all powerful beings. They took a good mortal friend of theirs and made him their guinea pig. Then, to keep him warm, they took a possum and duct taped it to his head.

Their dear guinea pig was very proud and vain, and he showed off this genius creation to all those around him. Soon everyone was catching animals and duct taping them to their heads. The problem was... those animals were still alive, and the people were too caught up in the fad to notice. They didn't feed the poor things and many, many animals died. The remaining animals, deep in hiding, appealed to the Godly Powers to help them. So the Godly Powers told them what to do the next time one of them was caught. The next one to be caught happened to be a porcupine.

A woman, looking for a new hat, pounced on him, but he wriggled out of her grasp and launched himself at her head, using his sharp claws to burrow under her scalp. Humans had very... stretchy scalps back then. The woman immediately fainted and it took her many, many days to awake. Once she had awoken, she found the porcupine still lived under her scalp, feeding on her brain juice. What's more, to her astonishment, she discovered that the porcupine's many quills had pierced her scalp, giving her the first "hair". As time went on, the porcupine eventually died, and it's body decayed inside her, until it left nothing to her except its quills and stray hairs that had scattered over her body. She was the first human to have true hair.

When the porcupine was under her scalp, feeding on her brain juice, it was also secreting saliva, which altered the woman's genetic code. Her children had hair, thei children had hair, and so on and so on until all humans had fur.


Yay!